‘Tis the season for finals, holiday events and a break from school fast approaching. In the flurry of studying, getting in extra shifts and making travel plans I can get swept up in the stress of the season and forget to be present.
Prioritizing
In one of my recent episodes of overwhelm, my roommate took out a piece of paper and drew a line down the middle. She titled one column “Yes” and one column “No”. Under the “Yes” column she wrote numbers 1 through 5.
“Now, what are five things you will always say ‘yes’ to?” she asked.
“Only five?”
“That’s the rule. You have to limit the things you say ‘yes’ to.”
I verbally processed my weekly priorities including quality time, school, work, prayer, and rest. I was also allowed to have a few things that I could say “sometimes yes” to when my capacity allowed and it didn’t interfere with the top 5 priorities.
Everything else landing in the “No” column. Now, they weren’t in that column because they were bad things. I had to recognize that I simply don’t have the capacity for some of the things I might want to do. My dad reminds me all the time, “Molly, you can’t do it all.”
This simple exercise helped me get my priorities straight in a busy season. As finals are ramping up and the holidays are right around the corner, I’m re-evaluating my capacity. I’m learning it’s ok to shift my priorities to maintain a healthy work-life balance.
Schedule out time to do work, spend quality time with friends and family and downtime to actually relax on break and be present.
Letting go
Too often I feel attached to my computer. It goes where I go. You know the feeling of closing your laptop knowing you’ve done your best, taking a deep breath and putting it away for the week (or a day or two)? It’s refreshing.
The stream of things to work on never ends, so it’s hard not to feel like I’m wasting time if I’m not being productive. But my worth is not in how much I can get done in a day. My philosophy is, “It always gets done”. Somehow – even if it’s down to the wire – the project will be completed.
I always enjoy holiday breaks more when I prioritize what’s important from week to week. Before Thanksgiving, I get all necessary work projects and homework done so I can fully enjoy the holiday with my family and friends. I’ve tried cramming projects into break, hunkering down in a coffee shop to finish the things I procrastinated or want to get a head start on, knowing I could be hanging with family at home. I don’t recommend it.
Enjoying
Recently I heard a challenge: “Live with only two days on the calendar: today and your last day.”
Living for one day at a time not only takes stress off my brain, but it’s what humans are designed for. I can’t be in two places at once. Bummer. I’m not great at being present when there’s so many things to do swirling in my brain, but I’m practicing re-centering on where I am and why I’m there.
If I could suggest anything, when spending time with your people, do everything you can to limit distractions — phone, computer, notifications. It shows respect to the person you’re giving your time to and disciplines yourself to be in one moment at a time.
As you juggle relationships, work and breaks, don’t forget to check in with your well-being by staying active, being present in the moment and using mental health support resources Boise State offers like an online screening. These resources are designed to help you thrive and balance stressors effectively.
By balancing responsibilities with relaxation, you’ll return to school refreshed and ready to tackle the next semester.
If you’re in upper division standing, consider registering for COMM 483 this spring. This class will focus on communicating through work-life challenges, creating healthy habits and fostering relationships in and out of the workplace.